Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Sorting

If you are reading over at my other place, you know that I am engaged in the task of sorting through my son's belongings, having finally emptied the storage locker into which we placed them nearly two years ago.

It's going to take me several days, not because there's much stuff -- there isn't -- but because it's work that requires many breaks of long hours.

It has become a time of deep prayer.  For months after Josh died, prayer was not available to me.  (One of my Jesuit friends wrote a Prayer for Those Who Cannot Pray for me, which I will always treasure.)  Perhaps that is why I had the sense not to undertake this project for such a long time.

Now, I can do it.  It's sort of like being deep in the ocean, listening for the swell of waves above that might be God.

And for today, with excellent timing, Denise Levertov's "Opening Words" (you can read the whole here) ~ HT to People for Others.


Dust of the earth,
help thou my
unbelief. Drift
gray become gold, in the beam of
vision. I believe with
doubt. I doubt and
interrupt my doubt with belief. Be,
beloved, threatened world.



Image: PEI Sunrise, 2005

7 comments:

  1. As one who has also had a difficult time praying for the past two years, I have nonetheless found myself ALWAYS able to pray for you. I am doing it again today as you open boxes and enter your deepest pain once more. It is a sacred and excruciating moment, and you are surrounded by love and compassion and prayer and God's Spirit. May God's sweet mercy pour oil on your wounds and bring comfort to your heartbreak, as you push forward and do the "impossible".
    Much love and hugs and comfort to you.
    Karen

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  2. Sitting in silence and making space.

    And, keeping you in my prayers.

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  3. peace my friend, I have not been to your "other place" for months. will try to remember to stop over later, but I really should consider getting ready for work

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  4. If you ever felt like sharing the prayer for those who cannot pray, I would love to see it. I don't mean to pry, so if it's too private, I would understand. It just sounds like a perfect prayer, just the name of it.

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